Wednesday, May 09, 2007

搭的士,坐 Porsche~


Positive & Negative,任您點睇~

唔開心嘅嘢,記來幹嘛?!但若是苦中甚有意義的,一定 X 佢老母珍而重之而寫下。

昨天早上,大概八時三十分,我截了一架的士。上車的時候,我仍左打瞌睡,沒有留意到任何異樣。上車,坐下:「灣仔,分域街。」大概幾分鍾車程,佢開始打開佢兩旁嘅窗,瘋狂咳嗽,狂說粗口;期間還打開我的門!我 X 佢老母!

佢一開波同我講不如行壽臣山經司徒拔道,我話可以。佢老尾,去 X 到好 # 飄忽不定,於是我問:「大佬,究竟行香港仔隧道定經山?」

佢竟然答:「你老母一早同你講 X 咗行山啦!X 你老母!」

哈哈~ 我即場以備不時之需按了999,另方面我叫佢停車,呢條友又停喎!哈!學阿大同三三話齋,我好命~ 但係,呢個撚樣我有信心隻揪打撚到佢仆街~ 而又但係,我又好驚,佢黐鳩線咖嘛~

我落車,繼續 X 佢老母,但我戇鳩~ 即打三條九就 okay。但,香港人,上庭好煩的呢~

下車後,我好彩有 Nancy 義不容辭載我到公司。。。。嘿,在她之前的平治寶馬積架等,全部他媽的視而不見。喂,潔癖的我,一定不會停下來接載一個靚仔陌生人;我亦不一定坐你的車。但一句講晒,I love you Nancy!自從今天起,我會亳不猶豫的,我會幫。

當然,若您太污糟,即使我駕的是錢七,也要考慮。

「全個世界,最可愛是現在。每一分鍾心,中充滿友愛。人生之中,幾多歡樂事,歡笑快樂童話般可愛~ 現在與未來,永遠多可愛,有快樂同樣有悲哀~ 世界多可愛,友愛多快樂,手牽手前途任我開~」

38 comments:

  1. 你首先話: "我即場以備不時之需按了999“ 但跟住你又
    話: "我戇鳩~ 即打三條九就 okay。但,香港人,上庭
    好煩的呢~" 咁你到底有無報到警?

    又, 你下次遇上呢類情況, 就照up 以下章節嚇佢拋佢嘛.

    [按此

    “上庭好煩的呢~“

    有幾煩呀又??

    "若您太污糟,即使我駕的是錢七,也要考慮。“

    歧視 !!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. 嘩, 原來單野係咁, 咁俾著我就好驚喎... 如果俾我遇上, 點算? ... "唉, 你咪鬧, 今日算我唔好彩阿哥, 你俾我落車, 我屋企人唔係俾你鬧既, 放我落車唔該..." 然後, 我一定唔會折順風車, call的士囉.

    ReplyDelete
  3. MD:

    你答得好搞嘢呀!哇哈哈哈哈!

    ReplyDelete
  4. 係美國有這個 theory 架~~~

    一個人做好事﹐之後散開再散開﹐就有更多好人好事! 但是有 D人好skeptical 又話陰謀論﹐咁就斷纜! Pay it forward

    ReplyDelete
  5. 居然有這樣的的士司機?你應該報警啦。
    佢可能是甚麼專車少女然後姦殺她們的人魔。
    佢以為你是索女,車錯了,所以扮行錯路,勁變態.....等你知難而退,誰知你又真的下車。
    好彩,我未遇到這類司機。
    好彩,俾你遇到個nancy

    ReplyDelete
  6. xiao zhu: 好搞嘢咩? 我應該會係咁樣應付佢囉.

    ReplyDelete
  7. 嘩!好恐怖!好彩有個nancy救你.

    我遇到d有問題司機,我都係攬住自己的物品,然後叫佢前面停低,即刻付$落車,唔會同佢嘈,因為一個女子好危險.

    你有無記低佢車牌,司機名?

    而家搭的士真係危險過搭其他車.

    ReplyDelete
  8. MD:

    我只係諗如果佢係傻嘅或者癲嘅,你答得咁正路,唔知會點啫。

    ReplyDelete
  9. victor係噤定3條9姐,未按"撥號",係米?

    報警係底線,其他動口既,米狂d囉,最緊要唔好郁手(先)。

    條ly如果唔停車就真係要報警,話綁架都好。。。。

    順風車香港都唔怕搭既,男士來講,不過無幾可咁解,d人驚你踩污糟佢架車多d。。。

    PS 修修,利害!洗唔洗拋埋個後果?即係 reg 57, cap 374d?: P

    ReplyDelete
  10. PK_ 大佬大﹕

    告條L 樣綁架就難d﹐但砌佢非法禁錮好d woh﹗~~

    又﹐巔巔﹐學大佬PK_話齋﹐千祈咪郁手。d 的士佬好興
    係司機位旁放了些spanner 之類的鐵具﹐用來整車又得﹐
    自衛又得。你郁條L 樣先﹐條L樣大條道理話自衛﹐你就
    白兔仔都變黑豬公0架啦。

    ReplyDelete
  11. I thought there are rules for you to complain and report misconduct of taxi drivers?

    Go to Toronto man...most of the taxi drivers here are Masters/phD/Doctors from India my friend! :)

    They won't swear, they will just cut your limb off hahaha

    ReplyDelete
  12. 卡夫卡兄你講起﹐我就想起幾年前我去土記探收媽的往事。

    我落機那天時值深冬﹐橫風橫雪﹐我早在機上打電話叫親戚
    朋友們不要來接機。Checkout後上了的士﹐(才查)車那個阿
    差(今回呢個差叔係sikh ﹐唔係punjab﹐亦唔係回教佬)﹐成
    程車溜溜長同他吹水﹐原來他係印度某理工有電機學位﹐要
    他做的士佬有點受委屈云云。好衰唔衰我係飛機上看完報刊﹐
    話新德里某大學被踢爆販賣學位﹐兼報導了印度的學府對作
    弊偷試卷等等隻眼開隻眼閉﹐先入為主下總覺得條友其實無
    料到先要(才查)的士。:)

    又﹐其實阿差手車算穩陣﹐起碼無那些牙買加reggae 佬或
    大陸人0甘勇/屎。

    ReplyDelete
  13. K,

    "They won't swear, they will just cut your limb off hahaha "

    笑死我呀!

    ReplyDelete
  14. 卡兄:

    用單數 LIMB singular 而不是 LIMBS plural 眾數﹐真是可圈可點﹐
    很毒到!

    ReplyDelete
  15. ...

    各位多搭點地鐵吧,ride green, stay away from lunatic taxi drivers.

    K... heads off to your dark humour!!!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Mr. 收(Hi fellow Canucks!):

    Yeah...but if they got 350,000 new engineers every year, there must be something good...

    THEY do enjoy their music though...every time I asked them to listen to whatever they are listening as if I am not there, they get so excited and gave me the 10 minute history of their collection...which is pretty damn cool.

    Check this out! I found it...I dunno but its kinda addictive to watch. Man dancing in suits:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZBia1KqFCOo

    and 牙買加...oh shxt man they drive like they are running away from the militia in their home country...

    X: At least I can make you smile now so we are even...hehe

    Mr Space: 很"毒"到...Damn you really think about the difference...I am scared...

    3: Thanks =)

    Damn I wanna blog and stop studying...nite all!

    T_T

    ReplyDelete
  17. 今早上班時踫到個中年男人在自言自語:我兩歲就死老母,死老豆好過死老母,我無老母錫……。

    然後我看到他進入了我住的大廈,嚇得我馬上致電回家,讓家傭放學時到校車站接小兒子。

    ReplyDelete
  18. 三:

    我是地鐵捧場客!!! 每天上下班都是不見天日!!!


    收收兄 卡兄:

    我去多論之都次次都是在機場pickup架rental car 入城架! 從未上過TAXI﹐無你們的經驗!

    ReplyDelete
  19. 但翻睇 巔巔兄 他沒有詳細說明他用甚麼引得NANCY 停低架車呢?

    ReplyDelete
  20. DD,你冇嘢吖嘛?

    所以話呢,唔好搭的士,那d奢侈嘢,真係隨時隨地好似卡夫卡咁俾人切啫都唔知。

    不過我呢排都搭咗3次...

    咁Nancy靚唔靚女??? 俾我,如果係小狗小貓就會俾個free ride佢哋,什至帶佢返屋企,你喇喎... 哈哈~行多d啦你要keep fit =P

    ReplyDelete
  21. K,

    I don't cheat. I owe you one now. You've already made me smile in Haricot's.

    ReplyDelete
  22. So, which Porsche model did Nancy drive?

    ReplyDelete
  23. 收收: PK_ 講得冇錯嘞.

    阿大: 以柔制剛, 係好. 但我呢期脾氣唔啱駛. ^~

    Space 兄: 所以人有時應該正面 oD.

    樂遊兄: Nancy 佢真係一個好人! 哈, 同一日好, 壞一齊出現, 過癮.

    小豬: 係呀! 黐線佬至得人驚!

    PK_ 兄: 你講得啱, 我噤定唧.

    Macy: 個仆街冇司機牌. 但車牌係 FA 3901.

    三三 & 卡夫卡兄: ^^

    閒趣: 最近發覺香港原來有唔少黐線人! 小心!

    老五: 我還可以.

    Nancy 唔靚女, 但又女人味, 唔錯的!

    Wei, I'm very fit!

    霜: 係吉保車嗰隻型號.

    ReplyDelete
  24. so it is a Porsche Cayenne! with turbo?

    ReplyDelete
  25. "最近發覺香港原來有唔少黐線人" 不流都多, 睇你遇唔遇到. 終於有時間加番個"c"字. :)

    ReplyDelete
  26. 哥哥:

    我捉你字虱。

    吉保車 = jeep車(not jeep牌)
    你坐那個不是jeep,因為不是四驅的

    嘿嘿嘿~

    你唔fit呀收啦。果日明明見到你個肚dum =P

    妹上

    ReplyDelete
  27. 霜: 冇留意有冇 turbo 噃~

    阿大: ;)

    老五: 哎吔~~~~ 妖妖妖妖妖妖妖妖妖!!!!

    i. 更正: 係似吉保車嗰隻型號!!!!!!!

    ii. .... 收 o緊!!!! 妹妹, 我由36減至34呀!!!!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  28. 原來高人你唔好車嘅....
    果d叫SUV呀,中文叫咩「多功能休旅車」

    34... NONONONO我都豆都冇34 =( 你真係大隻啫~ =P

    做踩吓踩吓果d啦,仲有唔好食d過期嘢喇會病o架

    ReplyDelete
  29. 唔好唔開心啦,你應該為自己係一個男人而安慰,感謝神你大隻得嚟有d肥但仲好靚仔 =D

    (見你個髮型就知你溝死女啦)

    ReplyDelete
  30. BTW,我就嚟生吞咗你果d珠珠。今日唔記得俾md。

    ReplyDelete
  31. "但仲好靚仔 =D

    (見你個髮型就知你溝死女啦)"

    真心 ga??????!!?!?!

    另, 你都覺得我個髮型掂呀?!

    Ah ha~~~~~ 五妹, 你又 taste, 又品味~

    ReplyDelete
  32. "我就嚟生吞咗你果d珠珠。今日唔記得俾md。"

    我知~~~

    我喺阿大度咋咗型 la!

    ReplyDelete
  33. cheryl: "感謝神你大隻得嚟有d肥但仲好靚仔 =D" hahhahahahah!!!! 笑鬼死. :)

    LDD: "另, 你都覺得我個髮型掂呀?!" 人地講少少乙水吓你咋...開心得佢丫.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Sorry I miss this article.

    There are so many crazy people around in the city. Lucky you are safe.

    I like the song at the end. Is it written by Uncle Sunny? Haven't heard of that for a long long time.

    ReplyDelete